Saturday, October 30, 2010

BOOGEYMAN IS IN THE KITCHEN ~ OR ~ A FRACTURED FAIRY TALE

With all the fabulous Halloween decorations and wot-nots running rampid across the blogosphere, I feel the need to....contribute.

My Halloween offering is a true story about a "Boogeyman" followed by a couple of fabulous halloween creations by my darling grand-niece Tween Heart.

Note To all you fly by viewers : please feel free to speed right on to the photos and thanks ever so much for stopping by! *waving*

For those of you easily amused and enjoyed Rocky and Bullwinkle back in the day, please do read on.

BOOGEYMAN IS IN THE KITCHEN
...OR...


As adults, we know that certain fairytales are instrumental in teaching children certain morals and sensibilities; such as Hansel and Gretel. These fables are part of many parents' arsenal and are very helpful when applied....correctly.

When Monkey Head Fred (my son) was four years old, he had been throwing hissy fits over bedtime. "I'm not sleeping!" "I don't want to go to bed!" He wanted to stay up for as long as he wanted and fought like the dickens to do so. It was bloody hell!


Desperate to ease my this nightly trauma and with the best intentions, I decided it was time to reach into my arsenal and play the "fable" card. I told him a story about a Boogeyman who came out at night searching for little children who were still up after 8p.m. When he found one, the Boogeyman would snatched them up and put them to work in his dark, damp, dirty mine. It was full of bats and rats and spiders; a totally icky place!

I know, I know, bad, bad mommy!. In my defense, I did add that the children were returned to their mommies...eventually. ha!

Well, that evening when bedtime was announced, as expected, he promptly performed his usual tantrum. At first I gave him a friendly reminder about the Boogeyman. When he balked at me, I stepped into the hallway out of his sight, banged on the closet door, and with some urgency in my voice, I called out "OMG, it's the Boogeyman! He must have seen you through the window! Hurry! Hurry! get into bed!"

I had never seen his little feet move so fast! He flew up the stairs, brushed his teeth, jammies on, and was in bed before you could say boo! He was even yelling for ME to hurry upstairs and kiss him goodnight! lol! Shortly after that first (faithful) night, just the mere hint of the Boogeyman would send him running to bed.

It was total bliss!


My little fable worked so well I decided a tantrum free zone was worth risking possible therapy in his adult life. ha!

Besides, when he discoveres there is no Santa, the upside will be that there is no Boogeyman either. Win win...yes? lol!

A few months later, after Monkey Head Fred was all tucked in bed sound asleep, I realized I forgot to tell him that his uncle, whom he's never seen before, was coming for a visit. I figured since my brother wasn't arriving until late that evening and considering how my brother was far from an early riser, I could tell my son at breakfast. No problemo...yes?

Ummm nooooo! The next morning I was abruptly awaken by a very loud shrieeeeeeeek of sheer terror that seem to be coming from downstairs. In the same instance as I was jumping out of bed to see what happend my son came flying into the bedroom, slamming the bedroom door shut and *BAMMMMM*! he flew onto me with such momentum he knocked me back down onto the bed!

Still on top of me, he was clinging to me like velcro, pointing at the door and screaming incoherently. At this point I thought a spider, perhaps a mouse (we've had spiders, no mice, but you never know). I couldn't figure out the source of his unusual hysterics.

When I said, "Let mommy go look", he became more hysterical shrieking "NOOOOO mommy, NOOOOOO, he'll get you too!" "Who? Who will get me?" I asked. "BOOGEYMAN!" he wailed "BOOGEYMAN IS IN THE KITCHEN!"!


"What???!" was my first reactions....then I realized that my usually late sleeper of a brother, who, btw stands 6'5" and was a then 300lbs, must have gotten up early, went down to the kitchen to hunt for breakfast and was discovered by my Monkey Head Fred!

To a little guy standing at only about 3' tall, that is one towering man! Having never seen him before, Monkey Head Fred jumped to the only natural conclusion as to whom that tower was...yep, the Boogeyman.



It took several minutes to finally peel him off me, calm him down, and convince him that it was not the Boogeyman but in fact his uncle! It was even harder to explain to my brother that I absolutely did NOT describe him as an oger to my son.

Needless to say, my brother was furious at me...foreva!

The upside, my son was absolutely thrilled to have a "giant" for an uncle, showing him off to all his friends and making sure to introduce his Uncle to the neighborhood bullies! ha!

Moral of the Story

just when you're flying through life like Rocky, you will inevitably crash and burn like Bullwinkle...
or
...when you are certain you've got it all figured, life is more than happy to show you the loopholes.

The End


BTW, as you can see there aren't any Halloween craft photos in this post; I was just messin with the fly by viewers ha! Wanted to give them their Halloween trick!


Tween heart is featured in my next post! See you soon! Thanks so much for
dropping by!

Cheers!

8 comments:

Alaina said...

What a funny story, especially the ending. Look at the original Grims Fairytales the endings were not always the best and they used those stories to teach children. I wouln't worry too much about your son.

NanaDiana said...

OMG- That is sooo funny~ I have had a few "stories" I told the kids come back and bite me too! I ALWAYS read your post because I can't pull up pictures on my work computer! lol It makes you realize which blogs are worthy of story telling when you can't see any pictures! Hugs- Diana

I'm laughing about you tricking the fly-bys!

NanaDiana said...

Wait-forgot to add- I can't see any pictures on YOUR blog-and a couple of others. Your blog must have something that sets off an "alarm" reaction in our network screening-or your pictures come from a different source (imported maybe?)...I can see pics on most oher blogs. AND the other thing I wanted to add is that I can always see your header and that makes me smile everytime I come here! It is beautiful~ Diana

Dawn said...

Oh my, your poor son! LOL! You're so right about the loopholes!

My kids both have developmental disabilities and have a love hate realtionship with Santa and the Easter bunny. They like the idea of them but are really afraid of possibly running into them in the hallway in the middle of the night!

Denise@alloverroses said...

Such a funny story! I so enjoyed this. You should right a book! Have a wonderful weekend!
Denise

debi said...

Great story! I am new to your blog and loving it!

Mari said...

TINA, YOU ARE TOOOO FUNNY, I LOVE THIS POST...LOL I'M STILL LAUGHING :)BUT ITS A GREAT STORY :) I HOPE YOU HAVE A SAFE AND HAPPY HALLOWEEN AND A GREAT PINK SATURDAY!!

XOX!MARI

Sue said...

Little kids often take things so literally! You really put the fear of the boogie man into him, Tina. To a little guy, your big guy of a brother probably DID seem like one giant ogre of a boogie man your son! Cute story. hugs, Sue

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